| OOOOOOOHHHHHHH! |
(In the Space Tree, Mordecai and Rigby are visiting the Duty Free Shop, looking through a VHS Rental section)
Mordecai: Hmm...
(Mordecai looks at two VHS boxes: "Bucktooth Bob Goes to Space" and "Bucktooth Bob Goes to Space...Again")
Mordecai: Man, space is cool and all, but the VHS selection sucks!
(Mordecai and Rigby hear a kid speaking in a commercial, they look over to a futuristic television in the store where the commercial is playing)
Kid: Man, the selection in this video store sucks!
TV Announcer: Tired of watching the same old movie?
Kid: Yeah.
TV Announcer: Tired of walking around like a sucker?
Kid: Yeah!
TV Announcer: Then it's time to try "Hover Boots!"
(An explosion appears on the screen, giving the kid Hover Boots. A song plays as the kid hovers up in front of a fire)
Singer: Hover boots! You'll get caught up in the...Hover Boots! Hover Boots! Hover Boots!
TV Announcer: Disclaimer: Hover Boots are extremely dangerous.
(Mordecai and Rigby glance at each other. They grab two boxes of Hover Boots and slam them on the Duty Free Clerk's counter, causing the clerk to scream. Mordecai scans his Space Credit Card through the card reader, but is denied payment)
Mordecai: Aw, what? Denied!? How much do these cost?
Clerk: 500 space creds.
Rigby: How much do we have?
(The clerk checks his computer)
Clerk: Negative-200 space creds.
Rigby: Ugh!
(Rigby pulls out a coupon and tries scanning it through the card reader, but is denied)
Clerk: Sir, that's just a coupon.
(Rigby spots a hat next to him, grabs it and tries to scan it through the card reader, but is denied)
Clerk: Sir, no. That's just a hat.
Rigby: Ugh!
(Rigby throws the hat away and puts his arm in the card reader, trying to scan it, but is repeatedly denied)
Clerk: Sir, no. Your arm doesn't have any credits on it!
Rigby: Just give us the boots!
(Rigby lunges towards the clerk, but Mordecai holds him back)
Mordecai: Rigby, no!
Clerk: Security!
(A security guard throws Mordecai and Rigby out of the Duty Free Shop. They groan)
Mordecai: Dude, we have to get those hover boots.
(Later, Mordecai and Rigby approach Pops, who is reading a book while sat on some stairs)
Rigby: Hey Pops, can you transfer us 500 space creds each for some hover boots?
Pops: Hover Boots? I'm afraid not! You'll trip and fall.
(Later, the duo are asking Skips and Toothpick Sally for space creds)
Toothpick Sally: I don't loan creds.
Skips: Yeah, and you'll sprain your ankles.
(Later, they are asking Eileen for space creds)
Eileen: Feel like this would set a bad precedent for our relationship.
(Later, they are asking Benson for space creds in the Dome Terminal)
Benson: No way. You two have to learn the value of a space credit!
Mordecai: What is the value of a space credit?
Benson: Uh...look, I don't know! Just don't waste your money on junk!
(Benson walks off angrily)
Mordecai: (sighs) Maybe these hover boots aren't worth it.
Rigby: Maybe you're right.
(Muscle Man and Hi Five Ghost both approach Mordecai and Rigby, wearing hover boots)
Muscle Man: Dudes, check out my sweet new moves!
(Muscle Man starts dancing while hovering with his hover boots)
Muscle Man: Woo!
Hi Five Ghost: You know, the fact that they're so dangerous only seems to make them more fun.
(A group of Jamaican domers approach Muscle Man and Hi Five Ghost)
Jamaican Domer: Sweet kicks, mon. There's a party going down at the Jamaican dome tonight. You should stop by. All the coolest domers are gonna be there...and you guys are definitely cool.
Muscle Man: Ah, sweet!
Rigby: Hey, I wanna go to the party!
Jamaican Domer: Uh...no. It's more of a small ting.
(The Jamaican Domers walk off)
Rigby: Ugh, I want it more than ever now!
Mordecai: Ugh! How are we gonna get any space credits!?
(Recap Robot approaches the duo)
Recap Robot: If you're willing to work for the creds, I heard Professor Jacobs in the greenhouse is looking for some help with a secret project.
Mordecai & Rigby: Hmph, hmph! Hmph, hmph, hmph, hmph!
(Later in the Space Tree's greenhouse, the guys meet Professor Jessica Jacobs. She shows them around the greenhouse)
Jessica: In this greenhouse, we have vegetation from every ecosystem on Earth.
Rigby: So, what? You need us to prune your trees or something?
Jessica: (laughs) Something like that.
(They approach a locked door labelled "RESTRICTED ACCESS")
Rigby: Restricted access!?
(Jessica swipes her ID card over the keypad and the door unlocks. They enter the room)
Mordecai & Rigby: OOHHH!!! Huh!?
(In the room, they see a giant monster plant which screams at them. Mordecai and Rigby also scream)
Jessica: Stay behind the yellow line and you'll be safe.
(The plant screams)
Mordecai: What is that!?
Jessica: A little experiment of my own design. Unfortunately, it ate Dr. Craig Jacobs, my lab mate and my...husband!
(Mordecai and Rigby look at Jessica with shock)
Mordecai: So, you want us to kill it?
Jessica: Kill it!? My baby!? No! Never! I nursed it from a seedling. It represents the very pinnacle of vegetative development!
(Jessica calms down and turns to the duo)
Jessica: No, I need you to help me rescue Craig by going inside it.
Rigby: How we gonna do that?
Jessica: By letting it eat you...
(Mordecai and Rigby laugh)
Jessica: I'll pay you 500 space creds each.
Mordecai: Okay, we'll do it.
(Mordecai and Rigby wear exploration suits with a harness, hooked up to a winch. Jessica passes them two laser packs)
Jessica: Here are your lasers. When you find Craig, just radio me, and I'll turn this winch on to pull you back out. Now, if Craig is...not alive, please bring back the family necklace he had with him. It means a lot to me!
Rigby: If Craig's dead, do we still get the creds?
(Mordecai punches Rigby)
Rigby: Ow!
Mordecai: Dude!
Rigby: What the heck, man!? I'm just trying to iron out the details!
Mordecai: Don't worry, we'll bring you back anything we find, promise.
(Jessica begins to cry)
Jessica: Oh, thank you!
(Mordecai and Rigby look up at the plant, which roars and slobbers)
Mordecai: Uh, maybe Hover Boots aren't really worth all this.
Rigby: Dude, it's about more than the shoes. It's about rescuing that weird woman's husband...or brother or whatever, I wasn't listening. It's about never having to walk to places ever again. It's about looking so cool that we get invited to big parties. And it's about getting those things by using these sweet lasers!
Mordecai: You're right, let's do this.
(Mordecai and Rigby's laser packs are connected to one laser gun each, which they pull up in preparation for their quest. They step past the yellow line, and are immediately grabbed by the plant's mouth. They scream as they fall into its throat. Rigby's elbow is pointing into Mordecai's face)
Rigby: It's so gross!
Mordecai: Dude, get your elbow outta my face!
(Mordecai and Rigby scream as they are swallowed whole by the plant, falling into its throat. They land, to find that inside the plant is pitch-black, unable to see their surroundings. Mordecai activates his laser gun, which acts as a torch, lighting up the area. Inside the plant are countless other plants, as well as a few skeletal corpses)
Mordecai: Whoa...
(Rigby activates his laser gun and sees the corpses)
Rigby: Uh, I'm scared.
Mordecai: Let's just get this over with. Just think about all the sweet hover tricks we're gonna do once we get all those space creds!
(Mordecai and Rigby journey through the plant)
Mordecai & Rigby: Hover Boots! Hover Boots! Hover Boots! Hover Boots! Hover Boots! Hover Boots! Hover Boots!
(A strange figure watches them from the bushes. Later, Mordecai and Rigby are still searching for Craig)
Rigby: What!? That's insane! Everybody knows you find the Sword of Unbreakability in the third dungeon by beating the boss and pressing Up, Down, Left, Right, B, A, B, A, B, A, Start, unplugging controller one, plugging it back in, and hitting Select and Start at the same time!
Mordecai: No, dude. That's how you get the Wand of Unusual Effect, not the Sword of Unbreakability. I feel like I don't even know who you are, right now.
(Rigby hears a strange noise around him)
Rigby: Shh! Did you hear that?
Mordecai: You shh!
Rigby: Shh!
Mordecai: Shh!
Rigby: Shh! Stop talking!
(The two continue walking, but then hear the same noise again. This time, Mordecai hears it)
Mordecai: Hey, I think I just heard something.
Rigby: Yeah! No doy!
(Red eyes begin to illuminate from the bushes around them)
Rigby: Uh...
Mordecai: Dude, nice job!
Rigby: Ugh! Uh, maybe we should walk a little faster.
Mordecai: No, let's walk a lot faster.
(Mordecai and Rigby walk faster through the plant, as a large six-legged buglike creature emerges from a bush. Mordecai and Rigby scream)
Rigby: Dude, what is that!?
(The duo turn around to see more of the same bugs coming from the bushes and running towards them. They are surrounded by them)
Mordecai: Uh, oh. (screams) What do we do!?
Rigby: Dude, we have lasers!
Mordecai: Oh, right!
(Mordecai and Rigby aim their laser guns at the bugs)
Mordecai: Time to take out the...oh, wait. Time to...
Rigby: Smoke some bugs?
Mordecai: Time to smoke some bugs...
(Mordecai cocks his gun, and the duo start firing lasers at the bugs, killing four and making the rest retreat to the bushes whilst smoking. Two bugs run into each other, then take separate paths into the bushes)
Mordecai & Rigby: OOHHH!!!
(Another bug pops out of the bush behind Rigby)
Mordecai: Rigby, look out!
(In slow-motion, the bug approaches Rigby as he turns to see it)
Rigby: What...?
(As the bug nears Rigby, the mysterious figure from earlier jumps out from behind the bushes and throws a spear at the bug. It nearly hits Rigby)
Rigby: Whoa! That spear almost hit me in the face!
(The spear stabs through the bug, pinning it to the ground. The slow-motion ends as things return to their regular speed)
Mordecai & Rigby: Whoa!
(They look towards the figure to see a naked muscular man wearing a diaper made from a bush)
Rigby: Hey. Thanks, man!
Mordecai: Hey, are you Craig?
Craig: Craig? Craig...yes, that - that's what they called me...outside the plant.
(Mordecai and Rigby approach Craig)
Mordecai: Oh, cool! Your wife, Jessica, sent us to rescue you.
Craig: My wife!?
(Craig laughs manically, much to the confusion of Mordecai and Rigby)
Mordecai: Um, we were -
(Craig lifts his finger up while still laughing, signalling Mordecai to shush)
Craig: Wait, wait!
(Craig continues to laugh manically, slapping his knee. Mordecai and Rigby glance at each other)
Craig: Phew! Dang, I nearly busted a gut over here.
(Craig begins to tear up and wipes a tear from his eye)
Craig: Oh, sorry. I've just been stuck down here alone for so long. Just me and those dumb bugs!
(Craig begins to breathe heavily, with a clear hatred of the bugs. Mordecai grabs his hand to stop him from lashing out)
Mordecai: Whoa! Okay, man! Take it easy.
(Craig calms down)
Craig: Uh, what were we talking about?
Rigby: We were about to -
Craig: Jessica, that's right. Yeah, she was my wife, but not anymore! Not after...the incident.
(A flashback begins of Craig and Jessica in the Space Tree's greenhouse)
Craig: Jess, this has gone too far! I mean, look at this thing!
(Craig points to the monster plant)
Craig: It's unnatural!
(Jessica slaps Craig)
Jessica: Don't you dare say that about our baby!
Craig: Ever since we got to space, these experiments have gotten further and further out of control! It needs to stop! And this abomination needs to be destroyed!
Jessica: You'll never take my baby away from me! Never!!
(Jessica pushes Craig, who grabs her necklace as he falls back passed the marked yellow lines)
Jessica: No!
Craig: You always loved this necklace more than me! Now, you'll never see it again! (laughs)
(Craig, with the necklace, is grabbed by the plant's mouth)
Jessica: No!
(Jessica cries as she watches Craig fall into the plant's throat, holding her diamond necklace. The flashback ends)
Craig: (laughs) It feels like only happened yesterday!
Rigby: When did this happen?
Craig: Yesterday.
Mordecai: Wait, what? How'd you lose your clothes already!?
Rigby: Yeah, you look terrible!
Craig: Living in space is one thing, but living in a giant monster plant messes you up, man.
Mordecai: Uh, well we're just doing this to make some space creds, so...
Craig: (laughs) Jessica doesn't have any money!
Rigby: Aw, what!?
Craig: She only sent you down here to get her diamond necklace back. She spent all her money on this gross plant! But if you guys help me get out of here, I'll pay you whatever she offered!
Mordecai: Uh, alright. Deal.
Rigby: Yeah, we don't really care as long as we get paid.
Craig: Now, let's get the heck out of here!
(Outside the plant, Jessica is contacted by Mordecai through a walkie-talkie)
Mordecai: Come in, Jessica. We're ready for evac. I repeat, we're ready for evac. Over.
(Jessica smirks as she turns the winch attached to Mordecai and Rigby. She laughs menacingly as Mordecai and Rigby are reeled out of the plant's mouth, screaming. She then stops the winch as they land on the ground. There is no sign of Craig. Mordecai's laser pack slides across the floor towards Jessica. The duo get up while groaning to see Jessica pointing the laser gun at them. Rigby puts his hands in the air to surrender)
Mordecai: Uh, oh.
Jessica: Hello, boys. Why don't you slide that laser pack over nice and slowly?
(Rigby picks up his laser pack as Mordecai removes his harness)
Mordecai: No problem. We don't want any trouble.
(Rigby slides the laser pack over to Jessica)
Jessica: Very good. Now, where's my necklace?
Rigby: Don't worry. We got it right there!
(Rigby points up to the plant's mouth, where Craig is seen lifting the mouth open)
Jessica: (gasps) Craig!?
(Craig jumps down from the plant)
Jessica: You're...you're...alive!?
Craig: Looking for...this!?
(Craig pulls the diamond necklace out of his bush diaper)
Jessica: (gasps) Gimme that necklace, Craig, or else!
(Jessica cocks the laser gun)
Craig: Jess, please! Stop this madness! You were a good person, once. Remember when we got to space?
Jessica: That was an entire week ago, Craig. I've changed! Now, it's just me and my plants.
(Jessica fires lasers towards Mordecai, Rigby and Craig, who quickly jump out of the way. The necklace is flung just outside of the yellow lines)
Jessica: My necklace!
(Jessica takes off the laser pack and runs to the necklace. Rigby also runs to it and grabs it, but loses his balance as he is about to fall into the yellow lines again)
Mordecai: Rigby, over here!
(Rigby throws the necklace to Mordecai, who catches it)
Mordecai: Ha ha!
Jessica: Ugh...
Mordecai: Hey lady...catch!
(Mordecai throws the necklace towards the plant. Jessica jumps to grab the necklace, but passes the yellow lines while doing so. She stands up with the necklace)
Jessica: Finally! (laughs)
(Jessica hears the plant growl and looks down to notice she has passed the yellow lines)
Jessica: Oh, no.
(The plant grabs Jessica)
Craig: Jess, no! Look out! Jess!
(Jessica is held in the plant's tentacles. She screams as the plant brings her up to its mouth)
Mordecai & Rigby: Ooh...
(As the plant prepares to eat Jessica, Craig runs towards her)
Craig: I'm coming, Jess!
(The plant throws Jessica into its mouth)
Mordecai & Rigby: Ooh...
Craig: Hang on, Jess!
(Craig climbs up the plant, where Jessica is hanging from the plant. Craig grabs her hands and pulls the mouth open with his legs)
Craig: I've got you!
Jessica: After everything I did, you still wanna save me?
Craig: Of course, Jess. I can't live another day without you.
Jessica: Oh, Craig! Let's just start a new life together inside this plant!
Craig: Do you...really mean it?
Jessica: Yes, let's never be apart again!
(On the ground, Mordecai and Rigby are still waiting patiently)
Rigby: Look, I know you guys just went on a rollercoaster of emotions, but is someone gonna pay up?
Mordecai: Yeah, we're trying to buy some Hover Boots!
Craig: Sure, I'll transfer the creds right now.
(Craig transfers 500 space creds to Mordecai and Rigby)
Craig: But, oh! Be careful! I heard those things are really dangerous!
(Jessica and Craig are swallowed whole by the plant and fall down its throat. Sometime later, Mordecai and Rigby have finally got their Hover Boots. They put them on in the barracks)
Mordecai: Pfft, dangerous? These aren't dangerous.
Mordecai & Rigby: Hmph, hmph! Hmph, hmph!
(Mordecai and Rigby activate the Hover Boots and are instantly sent flying into the air. They hit the ceiling and fall to the ground, groaning, with Rigby laying over Mordecai, whose Hover Boots then activate themselves and send the duo under one of the bunk beds, knocking it over)
End of "Space Creds"