| OOOOOOOHHHHHHH! |
(Immediately following the events of "Space Escape", the Park Dome blasts through space. In the control room, Mordecai, Rigby, Pops, Skips, Muscle Man, Hi Five Ghost and Eileen panic as Benson takes control)
Benson: Quiet, everyone! Muscle Man, status report!
(Muscle Man checks the range between the Park Dome and Anti-Pops' space station)
Muscle Man: Okay, okay, we're out of range!
(The dome stops)
Mordecai: I can't believe what just happened!
Eileen: Sureshot, Rawls...do you think they're...?
Benson: Let's not think about that now. I - I'm sure they're fine.
Rigby: But what's the deal with that Anti-Pops guy? Why is he out to get us?
Skips: Not us...Pops!
Pops: I don't know why he'd be after me. Does he think I owe him money or something?
(Skips shrugs his shoulders and grunts)
Benson: We've got our coordinates, we should keep going on our mission. Full systems check!
(Muscle Man performs an integrity check on the dome)
Muscle Man: Dome integrity at one-hundred percent!
(Eileen performs an engine check)
Eileen: No damage to engines.
(Hi Five Ghost performs a power check)
Hi Five Ghost: Power systems and shields at full capacity.
Benson: Whoa, seriously? We didn't get hit at all?
Eileen: Wait a sec...
(Eileen performs a more intense check)
Eileen: It actually looks like there's one place we sustained damage.
(At Skips' House, Skips' bed has been disintegrated. Skips picks up its ashes, which fall through his fingers. Skips tears up)
Skips: My bed. How did this happen?
(A flashback begins to the prior episode. Chance Sureshot and Toothpick Sally are running through a corridor. Sureshot fires his weapon at one of Anti-Pops' minions, but it misses and shoots past him. The laser ricochets on the walls, then heads down a corridor, then fires through a cubicle in a bathroom. A toilet chain can be heard flushing, as the laser fires out of the cubicle, then ricochets into the Park Dome, blasting through Skips' window and hitting his bed. The flashback ends)
Muscle Man: I guess we'll never know.
Skips: Ugh, I need a new bed.
Benson: You know, I need one too.
Eileen: I never had a bed at the park!
Pops: My bed turned into a computer.
Benson: Ugh! As if it wasn't enough for them to blow up the Space Tree and chase us halfway into the next sector. Most of us don't even have a place to sleep! Before we continue our mission, we're gonna get new beds! Eileen! Plot a course to the closest bed store!
Eileen: Uh, I'm not one-hundred percent sure how to do that.
Benson: Eileen! Figure out how to plot a course to the closest bed store!
(Later, the Park Dome arrives at a large UMÄK. Mordecai and Rigby are the first to exit the dome)
Mordecai: Whoa...this is the biggest UMÄK I've ever seen!
Rigby: I can't wait to have some of their meatballs!
(Skips, Eileen and Pops follow the duo out of the dome, shortly followed by Benson, Muscle Man and Hi Five Ghost, who stop at the exit)
Benson: Okay, you guys guard the dome while we're gone.
(Benson follows the rest of the team while Muscle Man and Hi Five Ghost stay at the dome)
Muscle Man: Alright, Captain Benson, bro!
(In UMÄK, a lost boyfriend is calling for his missing girlfriend)
Boyfriend: Maggie? Maggie? Has anybody seen my girlfriend?
(The lost boyfriend walks off, as the park team walk in through the door)
Benson: Now, stick together. We don't wanna get lost.
(A large yellow bird greeter jumps in front of the team to greet them)
Greeter: Howdy, folks!
(Mordecai, Rigby and Benson scream)
Greeter: Welcome to UMÄK's intergalactic flagship: Your source for modern furniture that's not only inexpensive, it's durable too!
(The greeter signals to a machine containing a wooden butt which presses down on a chair)
Mordecai & Rigby: (giggles) Wooden butt. (giggles)
Greeter: And make sure you check out our cafe, and have one of our famous meatball subs: It's meat!
(The greeter signals to a poster advertising their meatball subs, with the caption: "IIIIT'S MEAT?")
Eileen: What's the question mark for?
Greeter: Never mind that! Here's a map!
(The greeter passes Eileen a map. She opens the map up to reveal a complex layout of the store. Benson points at a section of the map)
Benson: There: Beds, Sector 1-15-Z. Is that far?
Greeter: Yes! Now, you better get moving!
(The team walk off. Meanwhile, a mysterious Bounty Hunter enters the store reading a UMÄK catalogue. She looks around, before summoning a hologram from her wrist. The hologram is a bounty on Pops, for the prize of 50,000 space creds. Meanwhile, the park team enter a transport tube to take them to the showroom. A montage begins of the guys checking out all the exclusive things in the UMÄK. Mordecai and Rigby play on a keyboard chair, sliding around to make music. Later, they walk past a reptilian couple, who are checking out a large UV heat lamp. The male reptile drops down on his back, with the light shining on his head. He sticks his thumb up to the female reptile. Later, the team are travelling through countless transport tubes in search of Sector 1-15-Z. They eventually arrive and the montage ends. Eileen is watching Rigby check out a potential new bed)
Eileen: Rigby, there's no way I'm buying that bed!
(Rigby is shown to be on a rollercoaster bed, essentially a single mattress on a wooden rollercoaster)
Rigby: Aw, come on! It's the thrill you've always wanted in a bed!
(Meanwhile, Pops checks out an entirely metal bed)
Pops: Hmm, I'm not sure about this one.
(A metal spike rises and scans Pops. The shape of his body is then automatically molded into the bed. Pops gets into the mold and smiles. Meanwhile, Skips checks out the "cot buddy", a single foldable bed frame)
Skips: This one's cheap. I'll take it!
Benson: Whoa, whoa, whoa! Don't just buy the first bed you see! You gotta sleep on it every night. This is one thing you don't skimp on.
Skips: You know what, you're right.
(Skips looks next to the cot buddy, to find the "super cot buddy", which is exactly the same as the cot buddy but larger)
Skips: I'll take the full!
(Benson walks up to an employee scanning a barcode)
Benson: Uh, excuse me. We're ready to check out.
Employee: (sighs) Then go to the checkout.
Benson: What?
(The employee passes Benson a card)
Employee: You take the card with your bed's item number down to the warehouse, and that's where you get your beds.
Skips: Where's the warehouse?
Employee: So, you know all the way back where you came in?
Skips: Yeah?
Employee: Further than that.
(Everybody groans)
Rigby: Hey, you know what I could use right now? Some meatballs!
(Sometime later, the team are sat in the UMÄK cafe, eating meatball subs. The bounty hunter from earlier is sat nearby)
Pops: It does feel good to rest a bit.
Benson: We shouldn't be out in the open this long! This was supposed to be a quick mission. What if there's somebody after us?
Rigby: Oh, lighten up, Benson.
(Mordecai and Rigby take a bite of their meatball subs)
Mordecai: Mmm, mmm! Oh yeah, really good.
Rigby: Mmm, mmm, nice!
(Eileen picks up her sub, but a meatball falls out from the bottom, then stands up to reveal legs and runs across the table. Eileen groans and puts the sub back on the table, pushing it away)
Skips: It's only two space creds, what did you expect?
Benson: Enough with the meatballs, already! Let's get those beds.
(Benson walks off, and everybody follows. The bounty hunter watches them leave, then lowers her mask to swallow her meatball sub whole. She then lifts her mask again and begins to follow the team, but is quickly stopped by an employee)
Employee: Ma'am, you need to bus your tray.
Bounty Hunter: Bus this!
(The bounty hunter turns around and shoots the employee with an ice gun, freezing him in a block of ice. She then walks off)
Employee: Come on, I don't make the rules!
(The bounty hunter catches up to the team as they walk through the bathroom section. She hides behind a cart of pillow cases, then approaches the team. Pops senses that he is being followed so stops, leading the bounty hunter to hide behind a curtain. Pops looks behind him, then continues walking away. The bounty hunter pokes her head from behind the curtains. As Pops rejoins the team, he whispers to them)
Pops: I think someone is following us!
Benson: Really?
(The team stop walking as they turn around to look behind them. They see a large curved wooden chair)
Eileen: Eh, it's just a really ugly chair.
(The bounty hunter positions her body perfectly behind the chair to hide)
Benson: Let's keep moving.
(The team walk off once again)
Bounty Hunter: Phew!
(Suddenly, the lost boyfriend previously seen at the store's entrance approaches the Bounty Hunter)
Boyfriend: Hey, have you seen a girl named Maggie around here?
Bounty Hunter: Shh!
(The team look back to see the boyfriend seemingly talking to the curved chair)
Boyfriend: You see, I went to the bathroom a couple months ago, and -
(The bounty hunter shoots the boyfriend with her ice gun, freezing him in a block of ice. The team gasp as the bounty hunter jumps from behind the chair, pointing her gun at Pops)
Bounty Hunter: Pops, you're coming with me!
Pops: What!?
Mordecai: Run!
(The team run away as the bounty hunter fires her ice gun at them, barely missing. They enter another transport tube, and she follows)
Bounty Hunter: Agh!
(The transport tube takes the team to the oversized furniture section, filled with giant furniture. Mordecai looks back as he sees the bounty hunter arrive and run after them. Still running, Mordecai ponders the nature of the oversized furniture)
Mordecai: Man, who buys this stuff!?
Benson: Who cares? Come on!
(The team turn left, which the Bounty Hunter doesn't see. She looks both left and right, but can't find them)
Bounty Hunter: You can't run forever! (laughs)
(The team reach a dead end, surrounded by sofas and a large armoire at the wall)
Benson: Agh! A dead end! What are we gonna do!?
(The bounty hunter continues to slowly search for the team through the oversized furniture)
Bounty Hunter: Oh man, the bounty I'm gonna collect after catching you guys is gonna be as big as this big furniture.
(The team are still at the dead end)
Eileen: Agh! We're trapped!
(Suddenly, the armoire's doors open, and a mysterious voice speaks to the team)
Glömb: Get in!
Pops: What!?
Glömb: I said get in!
(The team look at each other, then head into the armoire as the doors close behind them. Inside is filled with darkness)
Glömb: Don't worry, you're safe now.
Benson: Who are you? Show yourself!
Glömb: I am the armoire you're hiding in.
(The lights switch on, to reveal the face of Glömb, built into the armoire's interior)
Glömb: My name is Glömb.
Mordecai: What's going on?
(Glömb notices Pops)
Glömb: (gasps) I can't believe my drawers! It is you! The chosen one...it is an honor.
Pops: The chosen one? But I'm Pops.
Glömb: Heheh, what an unusual name!
Rigby: Yeah, whatever you say, Glömb. Who are you, anyways?
Glömb: I am one of the many operatives stationed throughout the galaxy sworn to protect the chosen o-uh, Pops.
Pops: The galaxy? They all know who I am?
Glömb: Of course, The resistance exists solely to aid you in your quest to defeat "He Who Will Erase Us".
Mordecai: Anti-Pops.
Glömb: Anti-Pops? Oh, yes. Heheh, I get it.
Eileen: How do we know we can trust you? And why do you think our Pops is the "chosen one"?
Glömb: I recognized him from the sacred mark I bear: the symbol of the resistance!
(Glömb shines his light to a higher point in the wall to reveal a tattoo of Pops' head)
Pops: A tattoo of me? Oh, my! So permanent.
(Glömb shines his light back on his face)
Glömb: And it hurt like heck, which will go the same for you if that bounty hunter catches you and delivers you to "He Who Will Erase -"
Skips: Anti-Pops.
Glömb: Yes, exactly! It's imperative we get you out of here as soon as possible! Here, behind me is a shortcut to the exit.
(Glömb strains as he rotates the wall around to reveal a way out. He gets stuck)
Glömb: Sorry. It gets stuck sometimes. I'm very cheaply made.
(Mordecai and Rigby both walk forwards to help Glömb move out of the way)
Glömb: Go! Go quickly!
(The team head through the secret exit, but Pops walks back to Glömb)
Pops: I - I don't know what to say, but thank you very much!
Glömb: The honor was mine. Now, fly! Fly, you fool!
(Pops smiles and nods, then runs off to catch up with his friends. The team arrive at the warehouse)
Skips: We're almost to the exit! Come on!
Benson: Wait!
(Benson grabs a shopping cart)
Benson: We're not leaving without those beds.
(In the bed aisle of the warehouse, Mordecai types in the first bed's item number, and it drops down onto a conveyor belt. Rigby and Skips both grab the bed and put it on the shopping cart. Mordecai types another code, and Skips adds another bed to the stack. Pops looks back in fear as Skips loads another two beds onto the stack. Mordecai types in the last item number)
Mordecai: Okay, last one then we're outta here!
(Rigby and Skips struggle to pick up the final bed, being the metal bed chosen by Pops)
Skips: Why'd you have to get a metal bed, Pops?
(After a brief struggle, Rigby and Skips get the final bed on the cart. Suddenly, the bounty hunter appears at the other side of the bed aisle)
Bounty Hunter: I heard it's good for your back!
(Everyone gasps)
Bounty Hunter: You should've left when you had the chance.
Benson: I know.
Bounty Hunter: Well, now you don't have to worry about it. Because even without those beds, I'll make sure you get a good night's sleep.
(The bounty hunter points her gun at the team. Suddenly, the yellow bird greeter appears in front of her, along with the employee whom she froze)
Greeter: Oopsy daisy! Looks like we've been getting some complaints from our employees, what with your shooting 'em and all!
(The bounty hunter shoots the greeter and the employee with her ice gun, freezing them both in a block of ice)
Mordecai: Run for it!
(The team run to the exit)
Bounty Hunter: Hey!
(The bounty hunter chases after the team, leaving the greeter and employee behind)
Employee: See what I mean?
(Eileen points to the clearance section of the store)
Eileen: Quick! Into the clearance section!
(The team run into the clearance section, which is advertised as having 70% off mirrors)
Benson: Everybody, split up!
(The bounty hunter runs into the clearance section, only to find multiple broken mirrors. She suddenly spots Rigby's tail as he runs, and corners him)
Bounty Hunter: Just gimme Pops and this'll all be over!
Rigby: Never!
(The bounty hunter fires her ice gun at Rigby, but he ducks causing the ice to ricochet off the mirror and hit her foot)
Bounty Hunter: Uh, oh.
(The team quickly run away. The bounty hunter smashes the block of ice with her fist and continues the chase. Just as the team get to the exit, the bounty hunter shoots the door with her ice gun, causing a block of ice to obstruct the way out. The guys look back at her as she heads over to them)
Mordecai: Pops! Can you use your powers to try and stop her?
(Pops attempts to use his powers, but nothing happens)
Pops: It's not working!
Skips: Nevermind! Just keep running, Pops!
Benson: You might the only one who can defeat Anti-Pops!
Rigby: We'll try to hold her off!
Pops: I'm not running! If all my friends are fighting, I'm fighting too!
(Pops grabs the shopping cart and turns it towards the bounty hunter, as she runs towards the team. He then steps onto the cart, flinging towards to her, knocking her onto the cart)
Mordecai: (gasps)
Pops: Get ready!
(Pops pushes the cart towards the team, and Mordecai throws a meatball sub at the bounty hunter's face as she attempts to get up, causing her to fall down once again. Benson then catches the cart. Skips goes to the machine with the wooden butt and the chair, takes a map stand and breaks the lock off the machine's door. Benson then flings the cart towards the machine as Rigby opens its door. The cart crashes against the machine, which the bounty hunter falls into, sat on its chair. Rigby then shuts the door. Eileen grabs the bounty hunter's ice gun, which had previously fallen to the floor)
Eileen: Rigby, watch out!
(Eileen shoots towards the machine with the ice gun and Rigby jumps away, causing a block of ice to block the door's opening)
Bounty Hunter: Let me outta here! No!
(Rigby presses the "TRY ME" button on the machine, causing the wooden butt to violently push down against the bounty hunter, knocking her out. Moments later, the team get back in the dome and leave the intergalactic UMÄK. They reunite with Muscle Man and Hi Five Ghost in the living room with their beds)
Hi Five Ghost: So how was the store?
Mordecai: We got chased by a bounty hunter and almost died. How was it here?
Hi Five Ghost: Oh, wow! Me and Muscle Man were gonna eat burritos, and we thought there was only one, but turns out there was a second one hiding underneath, so it all worked out.
Skips: That was a close call, guys. Glad we got outta there.
Benson: Yeah, for now! How many more bounty hunters are on the lookout for Pops?
Mordecai: It doesn't matter. As long as we're working together and we got each other's backs, I think we'll be fine.
Hi Five Ghost: Yeah, like how Muscle Man and I worked together to fix that thing with our burritos!
Mordecai: Yeah, that's sorta the idea.
Pops: Great! Now, does anybody know how to assemble these beds?
Everyone: Uhh...
End of "New Beds"