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Regular Show Wiki
This page is the transcript for "Dumped at the Altar".

(Episode begin at Pops' house. Rigby is opening a soda and he gives it to Mordecai. He smiles at the sunset.)

Rigby: Hmmm. (sips his drink) So, how are things with CJ now that Margaret's admitted she has feelings for you?

Mordecai: Psh. I don't know. Pretty weird.

Rigby: Mmmm. Mmmhmm.

(He takes another sip of his soda.)

Mordecai: I actually haven't even seen her very much. She's had some friends visiting out of town, so we haven't really had a chance to talk about stuff. It's awkward.

(The ringtone from "Mordecai and Rigby: Ringtoneers" is heard. Mordecai looks at his phone; CJ is calling.)

Rigby: Don't be afraid of your feelings, Mordecai.

Mordecai: (smugly) Thanks.

(He hits Rigby in the face.)

Rigby: Hey!

(Mordecai answers the call.)

Mordecai: Hey!

(CJ appears in split-screen.)

CJ: Hey.

Mordecai: What's up?

CJ: Mmm, not much. How are you?

Mordecai: Good, good.

(Rigby sighs in exasperation.)

CJ: Do you guys have a lot to do today?

Mordecai: Yeah. Muscle Man's wedding is tonight, so we're gonna be pretty busy. What time will you get here?

CJ: Probably right before the ceremony.

Mordecai: Cool, cool. Well, cool. I guess I'll see you later then.

CJ: Definitely. I'll see you later

(CJ hangs up.)

Mordecai: See? It's awkward.

Rigby: Well, what're you gonna do?

Mordecai: I dunno. It's fine.

Rigby: Dude!

Mordecai: I'm fine, what?

Rigby: Ok, you're fine.

(Cut to the next morning at Pops' house. The groundskeepers are gathered at the front.)

Benson: Ok, Muscle Bro's on his way with the tuxes. Skips, you've got the ice sculpture covered?

(Skips rolls out the ice sculpture; it is Muscle Man and Starla's heads lip-locking in a horn of plenty. Muscle Man gasps.)

Muscle Man:  Our horn of plenty!

Benson: (spinning pen) Let's see, what else?

(Muscle Man stands up.)

Muscle Man: Can I just take a minute to tell you guys something? If you were to ask me to assemble a team of the best wedding planners I could find, a team more potent than the sum of its parts, each wheel turning...independently...yet together...

(Muscle Man breaks down crying, and smashes the sculpture.)

Mordecai, Rigby, Pops and Hi Five Ghost: Whoa, Muscle Man!

Muscle Man: Oh no bro, oh no! I'm sorry! I didn't think I'd be this emotional, but it's been a wild ride since about 4 in the morning!

Skips: Don't worry about it, Muscle Man.

(He gets a replica of the sculpture.)

Skips (continued): We expected this.

Muscle Man: (wipes tear) You guys...(yells in happiness) I meant what I said about the...

(He feels another breakdown, but Benson comes to stop him.)

Benson: (laughs) Alright. Let's get this guy married, people!

(Cut to Parkside Lux. Inside, Mordecai and Rigby are setting up the chairs.)

Mordecai: 57, 58.

(He holds his arms out to catch the next folding chair.)

Mordecai (continued): 58...Dude!

(Rigby is covered in chairs, pretending to shoot guns. He falls back in the pile of folding chairs and laughs.)

Mordecai (continued): Man, come on. Why do you always do that?

(Mordecai's phone rings again. He fumbles with it.)

Rigby: (getting up) Oh, man.

(He grabs a folding chair and goes up to Mordecai. Mordecai turns away and answers his phone.)

Mordecai: Heey, Margaret.

Rigby: Margaret? Is she coming to the wedding too?

Mordecai: (to Rigby) Go away!

(Margaret appears on the other end.)

Margaret: (laughs) I am coming to the wedding.

Mordecai: Sorry, Rigby was just not setting up chairs.

Margaret: That actually sounds a lot better than what I'm doing.

(We get a full view of Margaret's location. Starla is being prepped for the wedding.)

Margaret (continued): Starla's turning out to be a pretty high-maintenance bride.

Starla: Ugh! I feel like a stuffed sausage! Where's Eileen with my Gas-Begone?!

(Eileen frustratingly storms in with an iced coffee.)

Eileen: You asked me to go get you an iced coffee!

(She sighs, places the iced coffee down, and storms out.)

Margaret: I should run. But I just wanted to say sorry for what happened on our double date. I apologize to CJ too. I didn't mean to make things weird, it's just-

Mordecai: Yeah, yeah, it's cool.

Margaret: Well, see you at the wedding.

(Mordecai looks back and is shocked at something.)

Mordecai: Uh, yeah. Ok, bye! (hangs up) Rigby?!

(The chairs are stacked up together instead of in rows.)