Tants/Transcript

(The scene shows the exterior of the house, videogame music is heard playing)

(The scene cuts to the TV, where it shows a tan baseball player, a green baseball player, and a fire pit. The green baseball player releases a projectile and the tan baseball player jumps into the fire pit.)

(The scene cuts to Mordecai, Rigby, Muscle Man, HFG, and Thomas; still in his pizza costume, and they all groan in disappointment. Then everyone stares at Thomas)

Muscle Man: I told you to jump over the fire pit Thomas, not fall into it.

Pops: (off-screen) Happy Park-iversarry! (Then he runs into the living room with gifts, laughing)

Thomas: (looking at Mordecai and Rigby)  What's a Park-iversarry?

Rigby: Dude, "Park-Anniversary". Just break it down.

Mordecai: (whispering to Thomas) Pops is gonna give out really lame gifts, but just pretend like you like it or you'll hurt his feelings. (to Pops) Hey Pops! Happy Park-iversarry!

Pops: I come bearing gifts! I've picked out just the right presents for all of you. (Pops gives presents to Muscle Man, HFG, and Thomas) Oh, I can't wait! (waving his arms) Open them! Open them!

Muscle Man: (pulls out a can) Oh ho! Gag Peanut Brittle when a snake pops out! (he opens the can of peanut brittle, with his eyes closed, but nothing comes out) Or regular peanut brittle. Thanks Pops.

Hi-Five Ghost: (he goes through his bag to find green socks with red toe tips, a smiley face, and text saying "Be Smiley") Wow! Novelty socks.

Thomas: ('he 'pulls out a mermaid figurine) A mermaid statues made of shells? Man, this is...super-neat! Thanks Pops!

Pops: When in doubt, buy shells. (he ducks down) Now for Moedecai and Rigby's gifts. (he lifts two gift bags) I think you're really going to like these.

(Mordecai and Rigby grab their gifts)

Rigby: (ripping the wrapping paper) (he sees a box with the text "TANTS CO." in red and sees a man eating a turkey with tants on) (reading) "Tants" "Dare to dine anywhere with flare in Tants!" "The pants that are also a table!"

Mordecai: